Transformational
28 Days to Personal Power, life coaching, Mumpreneur, Relationships, Self development

Transform your LIFE, because you can!

Transform your life, you deserve to live your best life

Can you imagine how it would feel to transform your life and:

When you choose to transform your life, you will be empowered, feel focused, have increased motivation, be clear in what you want, believe in yourself again, feel confident, have less anxiety and fear, notice a more positive mindset, live a life you LOVE.

Are you ready to step up and Transform YOUR life?

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Transform your life now and reclaim your power!

 

If you could have the life you wanted, but not as much stress? How would that feel for you? Get involved and join our community on Facebook.

I have been where you are, I know exactly how you feel, it does get better. Transformational Life Coaching will help you get there. Try it for yourself  – Click here to find out more.

Some people call it living the dream, other people call it freedom, and some simply say… If only! When you believe you can you will! Just like making a cup of tea or coffee you learnt how to do that and now have the confidence to do it without thinking. But there was a time you couldn’t. We have to start somewhere. 

Book Your Discovery Call Now. Sign up today!

Take a step back for 30 seconds, close your eyes and ask yourself this:

Are you living the life you hoped for?

If you said no, you’ve come to the right place. Let me show you how you can find out how you can be the leader of your life, step into your own power and live the life you thought you could only dream of. Transformational Coaching is waiting for you. 

 

Confidence
28 Days to Personal Power, life coaching, negative beliefs, Self belief, Self development

Confidence, Empowerment, Commitment

Confidence, Empowerment, Commitment  these powerful words can really frighten some people. The thought of feeling powerful in themselves is so alien they have forgotten how to be.

I know only too well how that feels, to not have the confidence to face the simple things, to feel so disempowered your close to the edge, to not have the ability to commit to yourself, let alone anything else.  Sometimes life can feel like a rollercoaster, you get up in the morning and really want to take charge of the day, but inside you don’t know if you can. The day will either go one of two ways:  You will either say nope… I’m doing this today, and you step into your power. Or… you look at the outside world through your window and say… nope, not today. I just can’t face it.Both of these are perfectly acceptable, it’s life, we have good days. We have bad days. It’s not the end of the world.

The difference is, when you are living a confident, empowering and committed life, you are not focussing on beating yourself up for the bad days Can I work with you? You focus solely on getting through the bad days guilt free. We are human, we get tired, we feel drained and sometimes we just need to re-charge.

To feel empowered is to feel free from the inner critic, to feel confident is to be free from the human self persecution of ‘I’m not good enough’, to be able to commit to yourself means you are free to make those choices that you crave from the inside out.

How did I manage to find my confidence, to empower myself to commit to me? Well… here goes:

1. Release the judgment you place on yourself. Remove all shoulds / coulds and would haves from your vocabulary

2. Refuse to listen to your inner critic! It’s just a bad vibe that has raised its ugly head once to often… your inner critic DOES NOT SERVE YOU. It hinders you and holds you back, it tells you no, you can’t and prevents you from forgiving your past mistakes and yourself.

3. To commit to yourself you must believe in yourself, re-train your brain to find the positives in your everyday life. You ARE worth committing to! Putting everyone else first is no longer an option… it is not selfish, it’s YOUR life.

4. Grab a journal, and start writing every day, once you have written how you feel, what you want and what’s happening around you, re-read those words to yourself… would you say that to your best friend, what advice would you give your best friend?

5. Make a list… one small list every day of all the good things you do, all the small achievements. Have you had a shower today? Brushed your teeth? Combed your hair? These are all very basic, but very much positive achievements to write about!

6. Be kind to you, being kind to yourself and learning to be your own best friend instead of judging, criticising and doubting yourself… is another step towards you living a confident, empowered and committed life

And last but no means least, my final tip for today is to access holistic therapies. I fully promote EFT, Reiki and other holistic therapies as a way to help you re-wire your brain through energetic shifts. Negative energy is all around us and drains us each and every day. Embrace some energy healing and see if you feel a difference in yourself.

Be your own best friend… and if you need help finding your inner best friend, ask for help 💖

If you would like to find out more about what I do, come join me in the FREE Facebook Community – Click Here

 

28 Days to Personal Power, life coaching, Mumpreneur, negative beliefs, Self belief, Self development, self love, self sabotage

10 signs you are not accepting yourself

It’s so easy to fall into a negative dark hole and not accepting yourself. Especially if you have suffered traumatic events / abuse in your life. It still surprises me to this day how other people can impact who we are and what we want to achieve from life. If we let them. 

Just get over it they say, let it go they say, but is that enough? Is it really that simple? Of course it’s not. You have to work at it and continue to work at it. If you have ever hit rock bottom you will know what I mean. Hitting rock bottom can happen to anyone and majority of people at some point through life may feel like they have hit the deck and cannot get up again.

The good news is you can get back up again, and when you do you will find a whole new life awaits you, but it’s down to you to change the life you were living that made you hit rock bottom.

Life is a cycle of change, there ups and downs, we can even go round and round in circles and feel as though you are on a roller-coaster, however; this is life. Life isn’t all about beautiful smelling flowers, breathtaking sceneries although these little things certainly do help. It can get tough! Whether you are running a business, raising children, overcoming a health condition, fighting something that is out of your control. It really doesn’t matter what life path you are on, challenges come at us. These challenges that you face are not to make your life difficult, they are processes to help you. They show us that we are stronger than we think. You can overcome anything you want to… IF YOU CAN FULLY ACCEPT YOURSELF.

When you accept yourself as the beautiful soul you are, you lose these negative traits and life seems so much easier.

Here are 10 signs you are not accepting the beautiful soul you:

  •  feel fearful / anxious regularly Accepting yourself
  •  doubt yourself
  •  try to please everyone else
  •  struggle to find gratitude for what you do have
  •  need validation from everyone that you are doing the ‘right thing’
  •  have low self esteem and self sabotage runs your life
  •  compare yourself to others all the time
  •  have critical self talk regularly
  •  struggle to forgive yourself
  •  can’t love yourself

There are so many other traits we could add to this list, but I figured 10 was more than enough. So often I hear clients say, I can’t accept myself, how can I? I’ve been through so much there must be something wrong with me. This person told me I was useless and now I believe it. This person told me I was pathetic, and now I believe it. When you believe the negative you are entering into stuckness. You are entering into a world that is dark and difficult to climb out of. Remember; this is OK. Sometimes you need to enter into a darker space to give yourself space and time to deal with it. However; you don’t have to. You do have a choice and support is all around you if you can allow yourself to see it.

When you are living in self rejection, life can get hard, if you reject who you are as an individual you cannot accept the things you need everyday, you find yourself falling into self sabotage, lacking kindness, you may also find your emotions begin to rule your life. You don’t have to live this way. When life has hit you with several hundred curve balls, just remember you are not alone. It can feel lonely though, it can feel as though no-one could possibly understand what you are going through, this is more prominent in those who have suffered abuse. If you would like support please do join us in our Facebook Community. Click Here.

How can we turn this around?

A) Be kind to yourself

B) Find forgiveness for you and for others

C) Make a list of all the positive things you have done in your life to date – put it somewhere that you can see it every day

D) Change your self talk to positive – write down one good thing about yourself everyday

E) Accept how you feel – it’s OK to have feelings, you have the right to feel anything you want to. This doesn’t mean you have to let the feelings rule you.

F) Look within, do things that make you happy. Do things that make you smile. Find things you enjoy.

There are so many other things you can do to help yourself this is just a short guidance to help you.

The world really is your oyster, and this is all starts with you. Accept yourself as you are and watch all the negative float away

Can you imagine what it is like to fully accept yourself for all that you are and all that you want / need? 

Key things to remember: 

  • You are worthy and deserving
  • You are amazing just as you are
  • Your inner star is waiting for you to show up

 

Self Acceptance and Clarity
28 Days to Personal Power, life coaching, negative beliefs, Self belief, Self development, self sabotage

When Self Acceptance and Clarity are your Foundation Points

Gaining clarity can seem difficult when you are under pressure and stressed, but what is it that ‘puts’ pressure and stress on us? Let’s take a moment to really look at the bigger picture.

When we are stressed are we living with complete self acceptance? The very simple answer to this is no! No we are not living in self acceptance when we are stressed or under pressure.  When we are stressed we are not in our flow. We might not be functioning in positive self talk either here are some examples of what I mean:

A) We might be telling ourselves its all too much 

B) We might be telling ourselves we can’t do it 

C) We might be telling ourselves we have too much to do and not enough time 

D) We might be telling ourselves we are not good enough 

E) We might be telling ourselves we are failures 

This negative self talk creeps in when we are stressed and under pressure, we can forget the basics, we can forget to look after ourselves and even forget to breathe. The breath is vital when stress kicks in as this is one way in which we can calm our reactions.

What does stress have to do with self acceptance? Have you ever noticed in some people when they are dealing with stressful situations /  issues they remain calm, consistent and not a lot seems to phase them? This is mainly because they accept themselves and don’t see the issues they are phasing as personal issues.

When you truly accept yourself as you are dealing with life’s stressor’s comes with more peace. Accepting yourself is the foundation to peace and clarity, it really is that simple.

Something I recently discovered for myself was a family issue came up of quite a serious nature and it hit me hard. I had a lot of things I had to contend with and through this I found this slightly difficult to deal with on a personal level, mainly because it is a personal thing I’m dealing with. But on reflection and letting the emotions flow, I’ve recognised that a part of me has fallen ‘victim’ again. When we have been through trauma the victim part of us can resurface time and time again. The moment I recognised I’m functioning in victim mode, I have been able to turn this around and the stress has lifted. I have taken my power back, this situation is not personal about me as a person, this is not my fault. I cannot control someone else’s actions. This in turn has given me clarity about me  that I can deal with these issues proactively, but also I’m allowed to feel sad, angry and uncertain. My emotions are perfectly acceptable for this situation. I accept myself!

Using EFT I also have the power to help me ‘deal’ with the issues we as a family are facing. Recognising that I’ve taken on the victim mindset but also allowing my emotions to flow is a huge part of the process. My old habits and behaviours would have been to completely blame myself and sink into despair. I’ve worked hard on my own personal journey to help me let go of this and this situation and the knowledge I have gained has allowed me to see this situation in a different light. Has given me the strength to be able to function and also see that I can accept myself, I no longer need to punish myself for other peoples actions! Hallelujah, it’s a work in progress but changes do take place and change does happen! Even when you don’t believe it can.

If you are struggling right now with a situation / person that is affecting you, take a step back. Write down the facts, write down your beliefs and ask yourself this:

“Am I fully accepting myself in this situation?”

If you are struggling right now and can’t see the wood through the trees, I may be able to help. Book a discovery session now!

 

 

Kick start 2019 with self love
28 Days to Personal Power, life coaching, Relationships, self love, self sabotage

The power of self love to kick start 2019

Self love is the most vital part to make sure your goals for 2019 are reached. I’ve been on this journey for two years now, and self love keeps coming back as the starting point. In every training session, every book, every webinar series and every blog I’ve read in relation to transformation and change all starts with this basic human need. SELF LOVE.  

In my weekly email today, I’ve shared a very basic technique that can be done in just a few minutes each day to help you learn the art of Self Love.

My mentor once said to me, “Vicki, darling, if you do not love yourself you cannot love others this includes your children” I was furious, how dare anyone imply (In my perspective) I don’t love my children, they are my everything. But this is not what she meant I can’t stress this point enough. It took me a long while to grasp what self love was. So let’s take a look at self love and what it means to us as individuals.

Unconditional love to me wasn’t something I was familiar with. I thought I knew what self love meant. But unfortunately I learnt the hard way. My understanding of self love was to be, do and have all that I worked hard for. When I failed at something there was no self love. I would be so hard on myself and could not forgive myself at all. Which in turn meant I was carrying heavy burdens and putting additional pressure on myself to do better next time. The stress this had on me was extremely unhealthy but at the same time was all I knew. This was my ‘normal’. 

We can become aware of unconditional love, and yet there can still be something missing from the link, when we tell ourselves we are acting in self love we can actually be acting in self sabotage. We can also have the subconscious self sabotage. I’ll explain this in more depth below:

Example 1: Starting a diet – we get ready, set the date and the date arrives and we stick to our plan, our goal etc… THEN… day 2 – we eat something we shouldn’t. Then day 3 we are good again. Then day 4 we sabotage again. This yo-yo cycle is because of the levels of self love we have inside. If we do not truly love ourselves or believe we are worthy (which also stems from self love) we sabotage on both a conscious / subconscious level.

Example 2: Being more active – we embrace the gym… being part of gym life we need a balanced diet to help our muscles, heart and breathing. We go to the gym to be healthy, but come out of the gym and eat cake. Saying to ourselves I’ve just burnt it off so it will be OK. This completely defeats the object of going to the gym to get healthy. Other examples might include skipping the gym… leading to not going to the gym at all.

Example 3: Making time for you – block out time for you in the diary but this other thing also needs to be done… you do the other thing instead of taking you time.

In the examples above these are just some of the ways we show ourselves we are not loving ourselves, and not worthy. Everything to do with self love starts with your commitment to yourself. What makes self love so important to day to day life? 

Life can become really mundane, unfocused and stressful. Always doing the same thing, putting everyone else’s needs before your own and eventually you become worn out, ill, and forced to take some down time. Here are some negative things that happen when we are not functioning in self love:

  1. We can become resentful
  2. We can be easily irritated
  3. We can lack focus
  4. We stop taking care of ourselves
  5. Energy levels decrease
  6. Things you would normally do become stressful
  7. Time is consumed with negative unproductive thoughts
  8. Overwhelm can take over
  9. Patience levels are reduced
  10. Stress overtakes us

When we step into self love we function on a more positive level, here are some things that can happen when you are living in self love:

  1. You have reduced anger
  2. You feel secure
  3. You feel warm inside
  4. Other peoples judgement’s and opinions don’t affect you
  5. Energy levels naturally increase
  6. Negative reactions decrease
  7. We tackle our dreams and goals with ease
  8. We eat better and drink more water nourishing our bodies
  9. We don’t get sick

We feel calm and at peace with ourselves  LoveIncorporating self love into your daily routine will have positive impacts on your journey. Regardless of what your goal is. Whether your goal is business / work related, home, parenting, relationships or lifestyle etc…  The positive impact of self love is profound. I have personally tried and tested this theory and each time I focus on self love, I give myself permission to let go of negativity and life is a much better place all round. 

For more information and weekly updates sign up to mailing list. Each week there will be different focus points, exercises and information to help you on your journey.

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